Music Review: Abscess- "Seminal Vampires and Maggot Men" LP

Wednesday, October 31, 2012


For Halloween we're looking at another classic piece of metal, finally reissued on vinyl in 2011 by Horror Pain Gore Death Productions. I don't often post about death metal albums, but this one was too brilliant to exclude from my collection. After Autopsy's initial breakup in the mid-90's, drummer/vocalist Chris Reifert gave his attention to this disgusting death metal and punk rock hybrid. The band's sick sense of humor and sickeningly catchy take on ear-grating metal has made them an absolute legend in the death metal underground, and this album, their proper debut, holds the honor of being one of my favorite death metal albums of all time.


The packaging of this reissue alone is worth the price of admission: a urine yellow piece of vinyl with "shit specks" of brown comes with an Abscess patch, an 11x17" poster and a refrigerator magnet, just in case. Additionally, with the high quality sound of vinyl, you can practically hear the phlegm being spat through your speakers as the band tears their way through this landmark death metal album. This wretched collection of songs should appeal equally to fans of punk, grindcore, crust, and death metal with great ease. The songs are short and simple, heavy on the low-end with vocals that sound like they're delivered by the villain in your favorite campy slasher flick. While the demise of Autopsy surely saddened metalheads worldwide, I feel like this album more than makes up for their temporary absence. Songs like "Patient Zero" and "Worm Sty Infection" are instantly memorable yet ugly enough to scare away casual fans of the more polished and sterile death metal bands that have oversaturated the metal community in the past decade. If the punky style presented on some tracks isn't enough to sicken you appropriately, then the creeping agony of songs like "Fatfire" will certainly test your threshold for ugliness.


This album is one of the best things to put on when cooking a delicious and unhealthy meal or when having friends over to drink and get wild. It's sick, it's fun, and it's fast. It makes me want to put on a leather vest and headbang until I'm sore and exhausted. When more bands start playing death metal like this, it's likely I'll be enticed to start listening to more new death metal again. Until then, I'm incredibly fortunate to still own a copy of this slab of thrashing insanity. Despite this album's cult status, the label apparently hasn't yet sold all 500 copies, and you'd be a fool if you didn't stop in and pick up a copy for yourself before the supplies dwindle into nothingness. Crank this one LOUD tonight and terrify the piss out of your neighbors.
 

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